Diversity: “No, I’m the Other Black Woman”

I recently attended an international meeting for business owners in my industry. Since our business is global, there was quite a diverse crowd in attendance. Reportedly, 42 countries were represented. I found it refreshing to sit at a table surrounded by people from Russia, Ireland, Romania, Kenya, and England and learn intriguing things about them, their cultures, and business abroad.

However, as diverse as the group was as a whole, the largest contingency which hailed from the USA was experiencing a severe drought in minorities in its sea of white faces. So foreign was the concept of having an African American within its ranks that when I showed up a year ago, I was received like a rain shower in an arid place. I was greeted warmly, but I suspected some secret alert had gone out. I was approached with: “Oh, you’re the new lady from…” Translation: “You’re the new black woman I’d heard about.” I believe this because they knew far less about other newcomers.

For a moment, I felt special. I didn’t mind that I stood out from the crowd because I was different. But the reality of how much my race identified me in this crowd was made more apparent when the second African American woman joined a few months later. Suddenly I wasn’t as easily identifiable by my race. In fact, I had become indistinguishable. People kept calling her by my name and asking her about business in the Carolinas (she is from northern Virginia). Conversely, I was called by her name or asked about business in Virginia. We were never confused with the other dozen or so women in attendance—just one another. One gentleman in particular had spent three days in training with the other woman prior to my arrival. Yet when I joined him and a group of others for dinner one evening, he persisted in calling me by her name. I found myself responding: “No, I’m the other black woman”.

We all do it. We identify a person based immediately upon their physical characteristics. We see skin color or race first and then gender. That’s okay initially (if you’re trying to identify someone in a police lineup). But given the opportunity, we should all take the time to know each other as individuals. If you were faced with the diverse group of 180 people gathered from 42 countries, would you have taken advantage of the melting pot of cultures and asked questions? Or would you have sidestepped the chance because addressing cultural differences is misperceived as controversial?

Controversy when it comes to cultural diversity is born out of misperceptions. Misperceptions come as a result of assumptions. Assumptions about racial differences are often based on stereotypes. And stereotypes lead to controversy. The cycle repeats itself. It is essential that we get to know people we meet, work with and socialize with as separate, distinct individuals. Otherwise, we’ll find ourselves judging individuals based on what we think we know about a group they look like.

For our own amusement, “the other black woman” and I decided to go to a dinner event together to help out our confused comrades. Suddenly I understood how Michael and Janet Jackson felt when they showed up at an awards show together to prove to the world that they weren’t the same person. At least for them, they resembled each other. The other black woman and I couldn’t have looked more different. Instead of favoring Michael and Janet, we more closely resembled Michael and Paul (McCartney) in their “Ebony and Ivory” duet.
I take great pride in being an African American female, and I don’t mind people seeing me as such. In fact, I wear my skin color—as fair as it is—and my hair texture—as coarse as it is—like badges of honor. So go ahead and ask me about my southern roots, my culture, my heritage. Ask anybody about themselves when you’re uncertain. It’s when you don’t engage another person about their differences that problems occur. We need more conversations about our diverse cultures—not less. Therefore:

• Don’t be afraid to ask questions.
• Educate yourself from the source; don’t rely on stereotypes
• Be certain to understand each person individually.
• Always remember that one person’s actions and beliefs do not reflect an entire group of people.

What you’ll most likely learn in the process is that as different as the two of you may look, your commonalities far outnumber your differences.

For more information about training in diversity, contact Betty at Sharper Development Solutions, Inc. You may email her at Sharper4U@sc.rr.com or call 803-622-4511.